The Jewish Answer to Posthumous Baptisms

So. The Mormon practice of posthumously baptizing dead Jews.

I think how I stated it pretty clearly how I feel about it in this post from 2008.

I’m not even really sure how such a thing can even be done, since even I know that baptism has something to do with dunking a person in water (a ritual likely inspired by the Jewish mikveh, anyway) so unless the Mormons are going around digging up bones and ashes to concoct some gross Jewish soup in their Tabernacle, the whole idiotic thing is a symbolic and pathetic pretense of “saving” souls when they’re really just trying kiss God’s tuchus. As if spirituality is actually some game where the more people you convert over to your narrow way of thinking, the bigger the prize.

Even after a massive campaign to get the Mormon Church cease and desist with their blasphemous scorecards, the nonsense continues. Researcher and former Mormon Helen Radkey has uncovered evidence that they’ve recently done their unholy voodoo for Anne Frank (who would probably forgive them since she did, in spite of everything, believe people are good at heart.)

They must believe that they get extra points for the really famous Jews:

Radkey also recently found Holocaust survivor and author Elie Wiesel on one of the church’s extensive genealogical databases (guess who else kept long, creepy lists like that? Hitler, that’s who.) Wiesel, who’s still very much alive, is not amused.

The Church of Latter-Day Saints claims it performs these proxy baptisms “because all who have lived on the earth have not had the opportunity to be baptized by proper authority during life on earth,” and everyone should have a chance to get into heaven.

Considering the ancient covenant of Abraham that ensures Jews a place in the World to Come, surely they won’t mind giving up their ancestors for a little posthumous circumcision?

2 thoughts on “The Jewish Answer to Posthumous Baptisms

  1. Anne Frank is an icon to many people around the world of all faiths. I don’t care what anyone else believes. I just don’t want them to make me believe it. I like to think Anne would have become one of the great writers of the world had she lived.

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