High Holidays Fashion Report

user submitted pictureIt’s always a fashion conundrum deciding what shoes to wear on Yom Kippur, since Jewish law forbids us to don our leather Fluevogs for synagogue. Our rabbi always favors a pair of fugly, canvas, no-name sneakers, which we would decry as a style shanda except that even we consider it bad form to criticize bima fashion mistakes. But since sneakers seem to be the obvious choice for the “no-cow” rule on the Day of Repentance, we need to take a look at the alternatives:
Obviously, Nikes, Pumas and Adidas are out for their global slavery issues. We’ve always geared towards boring, oh-so-unstylish New Balance trainers because supposedly their made in America by happy, well-paid union workers, but Ha’aretz debunks that myth by reporting that most of their product is made in Taiwanese sweatshops just like the big boys’. Even our beloved Chuck Taylor All-Stars, an excellent choice for the Yom Kippur stye-conscious, have been co-opted by corporate schlockmesiters (Ha’aretz reports in the same article that Converse was bought by Nike last year.)
Searching out on the fringe, Adbusters’ Black Spot Sneakers could fill the void for Jewish anti-globalization, counter-couture fashionistas, except that Michael I. Niman has revealed that Adbuster’s founder and publisher, Kalle Lasn, is a raging anti-Semite. Bummer. So as far as our Yom Kippur ensemble goes, we guess we’ll follow in the rabbi’s footsteps and head out to Wal-Mart for a pair of Keds. Perhaps next High Holidays season Jmerica will come out with our own sneakers, manufactured by Oompa-Loompas with a dental plan, right here in the good ‘ol U.S. of A.

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