Glad to see the j. jokes page has kept its dark humor:
Hette had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she has a near-death experience, during which she saw God and asked if this was the end for her.
God said no and told her that she had another 30 or 40 years to live.
As soon as she recovered, Hette figured that since she had another 30 or 40 years to live, she might as well stay in the hospital and have the facelift, liposuction and tummy tuck that she had always promised herself. When she got out of the hospital, she even changed the color of her hair.
Some weeks later, as Hette was crossing the street after leaving the hospital, she was knocked over and killed by a car.
When she arrived in front of God, Hette was annoyed. I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years!
God replied, I didnt recognize you.
(Joke © David Minkoff. Photo of plastic surgery-gone-wild poster girl Jocelyne Wildenstein courtesy of PlasticSurgeryHumor.)