I was raised in a religious home where modesty was very important. I live on my own now and I enjoy living a secular life, but I’m still not comfortable wearing tight clothes that make men stare. Is there a way to look stylish and be attractive to men without showing a lot of skin?
– Feeling Frumpy, Atlanta, GA
Yo, Frumpy!: Oh, you seem like such a shayner maydeleh-so many of the girls today dress like such-how shall I put this delicately-sluts. When did it become socially acceptable to show one’s brastraps to the world? And those thong panties peeking out over the jeans of teenage girls? It’s so low-class it makes Monica Lewinsky look like a maven. Stripper chic may be all the rage with celebrities and at the junior high, but it’s high time women stopped taking fashion tips from anorexic drama queens.
What’s most important here is that you feel comfortable and attractive. You’re a free, young woman and it is a refreshing change to find someone who respects her body and values modesty these days. Your beshert will be a man who loves this and everything else about you, so your job is to clothe yourself so he’ll find you. You don’t want to be mistaken for someone’s cleaning lady, naturally. My advice is to take a friend shopping with you, someone whose style you admire but don’t necessarily want to emulate. This is probably not your mother.
If you’re lucky enough to have a fabulous faggele in your life, take him. Try out colors. See what fits. Find out what fabrics feel best. Adding a scarf or a broach or both to an otherwise dowdy dress makes you fartpitzed. Once you find a brand or company that fits, try shopping online for their new products. I own six pairs of John Fluevog shoes because they’re comfortable, outrageous and sinfully expensive; that’s me. Maybe you’ll start a clog collection with pairs for every day of the week. Or you might decide showing a little cleavage on a Saturday night date won’t kill you.