Evan and Jaron Lowenstein, the pop duo who set off a butterfly effect caused by the fluttering eyelashes of Jewish girls everywhere with their cute fruminess way back in early 2000, are back to life, back to reality reality TV, that is.
Their invention? The PitPort. A bowl that hides pits, like one of those ashtrays that hides stinky butts. Like, when you’ve got a bunch of Jews noshing on olives, or maybe dates, or even cherries if it’s summer, you’ve got this issue of where to spit the pits. And Evan and Jaron have solved this issue as a way to get their pretty punims back in the spotlight, because their last album failed to capture the hormonal urgings of those same Jewish girls, who have all moved on to Matisyahu.
“We’re gonna be famous again!” shouted Evan on the show.
Eww. I’d rather carry a hundred olive pits around in my underpants than watch these once-innocent boys whore themselves like this.