I heard on NPR an essay from someone who obviously had problems with his own Jewish day school upbringing when he presented one defies-logic “law” after another defies-logic “law”, a la chicken=beef, G-d versus God. With each example he said, “The Rabbis tell us the Sages tell us the Torah tells us…” Frankly, I believe that 95% of the stuff that divides one sect of Jew from another came from a bunch of guys who had way too much time on their hands.

We’re all Jews. Anyone who disagrees in any way, please, get over it.

I forgot to add that the Reform movement has its roots in Germany as an outgrowth of the Enlightenment and emancipation of pretty much every non-Christian after the French Revolution. The original Reformers were reacting to what they thought were the “irrational” ways of shtetl Orthodoxy. They were making an attempt to bring the new philosophies and approaches of the Enlightenment period to revolutionize and modernize Judaism. The other movements (Neo-Orthodoxy and Conservative) were outgrowths of and reactions to the original Reformers. Reform Judaism really flourished and became a true ‘movement’, however, in America. Haven’t looked a Wikipedia, so I don’t know if what is written there is accurate, but see what you find.

Just found your blog recently – you write really well. Comment on this post: The chicken thing is true and well explained by your rabbi. Interesting take on the differences between the denominations. I personally don’t love the “crazy, hazy, and lazy” even though I realize it is a joke. I don’t think it is fair, even in a joking manner, to depict the denominations like that especially to a crowd of non-Jews who won’t know better. I would be very offended if a non-Jew (or a Jew, for that matter) assumed I was lazy and didn’t take being Jewish seriously because I affiliate Reform (or “crazy” or “hazy” from the respective denominations). I think it just plays into feelings of insecurity and inadequacy that you very clearly articulated in your post. Many Reform Jews feel inadequate or not “authentic” because they were educated inadequately. The more you learn, the more you choose what you do based on content knowledge, the more confident and secure you feel as a Jew – whether or not you ever choose to keep kosher. Many (but obviously not all) non-observant Jews donate $$$ to or have artwork depicting Chassidim and Orthodox Jews because somehow on some level they believe that it those Jews are more authentic, or the “real” Jews. Everyone born of one or more Jewish parents, or converted seriously, is a “real” Jew. You obviously take being a Jew seriously, and are thoughtful about your choices. Sounds like an interesting day! Glad I found your blog. My husband is getting a hilarious birthday present from your T-Shirt of the Week link

Johnny~ I knew whatcha meant

Esther ~ Maybe I will try and get this up somewheres else, when I have a moment…always good to hear from you!

Mom ~ Thanks. You’re awesome.

Jean ~ You’re right about Germany; I should have clarified “American Reformism as morphed from…”
As far as the dash goes, I gave up doing that because as I understand it, the word “God” has nothing to do with God’s actual name, which of course we don’t speak, write, or even actually know. I feel like a poser every time I remove the “o” because again, I’m doing it because I want other Jews to think I’m more righteous, not because I think God cares if I’m symbolically subtracting a vowel. But I respect that you have your reasons for doing it!

I could have sworn I learned in hebrew school that reformism originated in Germany—Wikipedia appears to agree with this. But perhaps it reached it epitomy in the American south. I must admit getting very weirded out seeing the depiction of the unrecognizable Judaism in “Driving Miss Daisy” while living in Israel where a normative jewish life is the rule.

Love the ocean-desert metaphor, Johnny!

Yentita, if you would like said t-shirt,say the word and I will design you one but I might have to put a – between the g and the d

Southern Jews are a whole special breed because they had to keep their identity and not be too noticeable to the Klan. I find their history fascinating, esp. since many came with pushcarts and opened General Stores. Every southern town has a store to tell. rabbi belzer is keeping it going.
Great blog!

Really stunning post. Funny, informative, observational…you need to keep this one. Or maybe polish it a little and submit it to the J or somewhere else. Drop me a line if you want to brainstorm.

The joke about when conception begins? I’ve heard it with a different punchline. The Jew says: when the fetus graduates from medical school.

As for chicken, the question is really “if chicken is meat, then why isn’t fish?” Both of those, not being milkable animals, should be in the same category, if you ask an Urban Kvetch.

And least importantly, I’m totally flattered that you thought of me (and NYC) so much while writing and titling (and singing) this post. Glad to know you’re still reading and thinking of me, as I hope you know, I am reading and thinking of you!

Actually, I want to clarify my metaphor. Saying Christianity is like Judaism is like saying the desert is like the ocean. It wasn’t as clear as I would like. Isn’t it funny how you only notice these things after you post?

“We’re just like you, except for the Jesus part”
I guess this is true in that Judaism and Christianity are both religions. The changes “the Jesus part” made to Judaism are so extreme that the religions are so fundamentally different, they share almost nothing. It’s like saying that the desert is just like the ocean, except for the arid part. It’s the water that makes the ocean, not the sand underneath. I could go on with the metaphor, but I’m sure you get it.
Luckily, we have a decent sized Jewish population in Houston, so if a shul becomes too “protestant” we can easily find another one. Luckily, my rabbi would never allow that to happen in our congregation. If anyone suggested bringing in anything that sounded like it had Christian roots, he would start to act like an insolent schoolgirl. He’s pretty funny, even if he doesn’t mean to be.
I enjoy the blog, keep it up!

Just found your blog recently – you write really well. Comment on this post: The chicken thing is true and well explained by your rabbi. Interesting take on the differences between the denominations. I personally don’t love the “crazy, hazy, and lazy” even though I realize it is a joke. I don’t think it is fair, even in a joking manner, to depict the denominations like that especially to a crowd of non-Jews who won’t know better. I would be very offended if a non-Jew (or a Jew, for that matter) assumed I was lazy and didn’t take being Jewish seriously because I affiliate Reform (or “crazy” or “hazy” from the respective denominations). I think it just plays into feelings of insecurity and inadequacy that you very clearly articulated in your post. Many Reform Jews feel inadequate or not “authentic” because they were educated inadequately. The more you learn, the more you choose what you do based on content knowledge, the more confident and secure you feel as a Jew – whether or not you ever choose to keep kosher. Many (but obviously not all) non-observant Jews donate $$$ to or have artwork depicting Chassidim and Orthodox Jews because somehow on some level they believe that it those Jews are more authentic, or the “real” Jews. Everyone born of one or more Jewish parents, or converted seriously, is a “real” Jew. You obviously take being a Jew seriously, and are thoughtful about your choices. Sounds like an interesting day! Glad I found your blog. My husband is getting a hilarious birthday present from your T-Shirt of the Week link